Tuesday, October 8, 2013

True Blood Season Six

Warning: This review will have a LOT of spoilers? Why? Well, because I can't help but point out these numerous WTF? moments in this latest season. You've been warned.

Premise: Ahhhh... Hmmmmm...Let me see how I can word this. See, what had happened was... This season picks up exactly where the last season left off. With Bill becoming Bilith. Sookie having to deal with Warlow. Tara still learning what it means to be vampire. Terry dealing with the death of Patrick. Alcide trying to control his new pack. Andy learning how to deal with four fairy babies and Sam sort of dealing with Luna and her daughter.

My Review: *Sucks in breath* Chaaaaaaaaa. *sigh* Where do I begin? This season, we have a new show runner and apparently some new writers.

Why do you say that, D.N.? Well, because these new writers damn near forgot every rule in the book where this series was concerned.

The premiere episode started out awesome, with so much promise. But then, they decided to create a war between humans and vampires. Now, mind you, this could work on some level and make sense. But they didn't go that way. Instead, they wrote intelligent and fearless characters as idiots and weaklings. I have to break this down character arch by character arch. Please bear with me.

The Human vs. Vampire War and what went wrong:

First off, should contacts deflect vampire glamouring? If so, what is it about the eyes that allows a vampire to glamour you. Do you have to actually see them? If so, can vampires glamour people who are without sight? Was this a big issue? Not really. I'll allow it for the sake of the humans needing some firepower on their side. But still... can they?

Silver bullets that emit ultraviolet lighting. Way to go, humans. Point for you. That was smart. However, I draw the line at the vamp camp. Please understand, this place really didn't have much by the way of security. The had human guards with those special bullets loaded in regular guns. A few rooms with UV lighting, maybe a few silver misters here and there. That was it. The viewers were expected to believe that this minimum security prison should contain and restrain the likes of one Eric-F*cking-Northman. Hell, even Tara should have been able to avoid this place easily and/or escape it. They didn't even bother to put little collars around the vampires' necks to explode their heads if they tried anything. That would have made sense.  There even came a point when Willa (Eric's newest child) was able to walk around freely thanks to a doctors coat and a severed arm that was an all access key. What did she do with this new-found freedom? She locked herself back up with the rest of the female vampire population instead of opening the door and letting them run amok.

O.M.G, it was just so much. the more I think about it, the faster my fingers have to type. Bill, with all of his special abilities can't seem to find the location of this vamp camp and must rely on Sookie and Warlow's blood so that he may go save the vampires during the day.  Now, when Bill first approached the governor, why didn't he just glamour him into telling him exactly where the vamp camp was? Then later that night, go get your people? Wouldn't attacking that place at night make more sense then do so in the day?

Now on to Sookie:
Her character added absolutely nothing to this season. In fact, she came off as stupid, selfish and a bit, let's say, loose with her body. She encounters Ben in the daytime, supposedly, he's been attacked by vampires. She doesn't even question how when it's broad daylight and his wounds are fresh.  She invites him in and treats his injuries. Immediately, there's an attraction building between the two. Fast forward a bit, we find out Ben is Warlow and he wants Sookie to be his fairy vampire bride. He's been waiting for her for 5000 years apparently. Although the contract he made with her ancestors is only a few centuries old. Instead of telling him to kiss her ass and leaving him to Bill. She buys his story lock, stock and barrel, keeping him safe in fairyland. I was so through with Sookie and I couldn't wait for Warlow to bite her and be done with it. I was so tired of that setting of the fairy graveyard where nothing was happening. And the dialogue was repetitive. It's only so many times one can hear the words: "I love you Sookie and be my bride", and not get bored out of ones mind.

Now on to Alcide and Sam:

WTF? Alcide's personality switched so drastically as did Rickie's. They were both of sound mind at the end of S5 and crazy as hell at the beginning of S6. Your guess is as good as mine.

Sam apparently didn't love Luna as much as he led us to believe. In less than a week after her death, he's claiming he loves another woman who is also pregnant with his child.

These people change lovers faster than their socks and with about as much consideration given, to boot.

Andy and Terry:

Andy was a saving grace this season. I actually enjoyed watching all of his scenes.

Terry... It seemed a waste, what happened to him.

Overall: The pacing was slow in places. Highly inconsistent in the plotting. For example, there were so many daylight scene when the vampires were the focus, but very rarely did they have the bleeds. Time scale was off as well regarding Nora's history. There were a lot of moments where it seem like the writers was like:

Shit! We're on a deadline, just get it done, I don't care how!
Even having said all of that. There were things I enjoyed about this season. I think they may have been able to correct some things if they had 12 episodes to work with, then maybe not. They need to not focus so much on trying to hook Sookie up with a man or anyone for that matter. Focus on an intricate plotline and risks that are actually taken and consequences that are dealt out. 

Grade: (C-) I'm going to have to have a talk with your teachers to see what we can do to bring your grade up next season before you leave here.

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